For thousands of Nigerians, japa is a journey filled with hope. It promises better jobs, safer communities, quality education for children and a chance to build a more comfortable future. Every year, many leave the country believing that life in Europe or North America will offer opportunities they cannot find at rhome.
For a handful of Nigerian women, however, that dream ended in unimaginable tragedy. Over the years, several Nigerian men have been convicted of killing their wives, girlfriends or fiancées abroad. Their crimes have made headlines not only in their adopted countries but also back home, where they have sparked painful conversations about domestic violence, migration and family life.
Although the cases involve Nigerians, experts are clear that they do not point to a uniquely Nigerian problem. Across Britain, Ireland, the United States and many other countries, women are far more likely to be killed by a current or former intimate partner than by a stranger. The Nigerian cases stand out because they follow a pattern investigators and domestic abuse specialists have documented repeatedly. Behind almost every killing were months or years of jealousy, coercive control, violence, threats or an inability to accept the end of a relationship. 
One of the most shocking recent cases involved Olubunmi Abodunde, who was convicted of murdering his wife, Taiwo Owoeye Abodunde, at their home in Newmarket, Suffolk, England.
The couple had been married for 17 years and were raising three sons. Taiwo had moved to Britain before her husband and children joined her in 2022 and worked as a healthcare assistant. Instead of bringing stability, the move coincided with growing tension in the marriage. Court proceedings revealed that Abodunde became consumed by jealousy and repeatedly accused his wife of infidelity. The abuse escalated to the point where Taiwo reported him to Suffolk Police for assault only days before her death.
On November 28, 2023, Taiwo returned home after an overnight shift. Police officers carrying out a welfare check heard repeated loud bangs before forcing entry. The court heard that Abodunde strangled his wife before repeatedly striking her with one of their son’s skateboards, inflicting devastating head injuries. Judge Martyn Levett described the attack as “ferocious, ruthless, cold-blooded, callous and savage.”
In May 2024, Ipswich Crown Court sentenced Abodunde to life imprisonment with a minimum term of 17 years before he can be considered for parole. The killing left three boys without their mother while their father began what could be decades behind bars.
Nearly two decades earlier, another domestic murder involving a Nigerian man had shocked Ireland. In July 2006, Goodwill Udechukwu was convicted of murdering his wife, Natasha Gray, a Jamaican woman living in Dublin.
The evidence painted the picture of a marriage ruled by fear. Udechukwu had previously been convicted of assaulting Natasha. Family members later told the court she had become so frightened that she often “slept with one eye open.” On the day she died, Natasha visited a lawyer to seek advice on keeping her husband away from the family home. Hours later, Udechukwu attacked her with a lump hammer, killing her before fleeing to Britain. He was later arrested, extradited to Ireland and sentenced to life imprisonment.
The disturbing similarities did not end there. In England, Adedapo Adegbola, a Nigerian social worker, was convicted of murdering his former girlfriend, Stephanie Irons, after she ended their relationship. Stephanie, 23, had decided to move on with her life. Prosecutors said Adegbola became obsessed with the breakup, planned the attack and went to her home, where he murdered her.
The court ruled that the killing was deliberate and driven by his refusal to accept the end of the relationship. In February 2026, Adegbola was sentenced to life imprisonment with a minimum term of 25 years.
The pattern resurfaced in the United States. In Texas, Osa Alohaneke was convicted of murdering his fiancée, Evelyne Ebane Epiepang, a 52-year-old woman originally from Cameroon. Prosecutors said their relationship had become increasingly troubled. During a violent confrontation at their home, Alohaneke stabbed Evelyne dozens of times. Despite her injuries, she managed to dial 911 and plead for help before collapsing. A friend who tried to save her was also seriously injured. Alohaneke was convicted of murder and sentenced to 40 years in prison.
The countries were different, but the stories were hauntingly familiar. In every case, the relationship had broken down long before the fatal attack. There were allegations of controlling behaviour, obsessive jealousy, previous violence or an inability to accept separation. The women were not killed by strangers, but by men they had once trusted enough to build a life with.
The similarities raise uncomfortable questions. Why do seemingly ordinary relationships descend into deadly violence? Why are women often at greatest risk after deciding to leave? Can the warning signs be recognised before it is too late? Domestic abuse specialists say the answer often lies in what happened long before the murder. None of the relationships collapsed overnight. Behind each killing was a history of conflict that steadily worsened. Jealousy gave way to control. Control turned into emotional abuse, threats and physical violence.
By the time the women were killed, the warning signs had been present for weeks, months or even years. Taiwo Abodunde had reported her husband to the police shortly before she was killed. Natasha Gray sought legal protection on the day she died. Stephanie Irons had ended her relationship with Adegbola, a decision he refused to accept. Prosecutors in Texas said Alohaneke’s relationship with Evelyne had deteriorated badly before the fatal attack.
Experts say women are often at greatest risk when they decide to leave an abusive relationship. For a controlling partner, separation can feel like the ultimate loss of power. Instead of accepting it, he may resort to threats, stalking, intimidation or violence in an attempt to regain control.
Among the most common red flags, according to experts, are extreme jealousy, repeated accusations of infidelity, attempts to isolate a partner from family and friends, controlling access to money, monitoring movements, previous assaults, stalking after a breakup and an obsessive refusal to accept that a relationship has ended. Domestic violence organisations say relatives, neighbours, employers, religious leaders and colleagues should treat such behaviour as warning signs rather than dismissing them as private family matters.
Experts are equally careful to stress that migration does not cause domestic violence. Millions of Nigerians have relocated abroad and built peaceful, successful families. Most migrant couples navigate the pressures of relocation without violence. Migration can, however, magnify existing problems. Many couples arrive with high expectations only to encounter unemployment, underemployment, financial hardship, expensive housing and the disappointment of finding that qualifications earned in Nigeria are not immediately recognised. Some men struggle with the loss of status that comes with those setbacks, particularly when their wives find work first or become the main breadwinner.
Migration can also deepen isolation. Far from parents, siblings and trusted friends, victims often have fewer people to confide in. Some become financially dependent on their partners or fear that reporting abuse could affect their immigration status or break up the family. Abusers sometimes exploit that isolation by cutting them off from relatives, controlling money or making them believe they have nowhere else to go.
Researchers say these pressures do not create abusive behaviour. They simply worsen relationships where controlling tendencies and violence already exist. In the UK and Ireland, judges have repeatedly rejected attempts to use culture, financial hardship or relationship problems as excuses for murder. Their message has been consistent. Every offender is responsible for his own actions.
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